silent night

it will happen…you will have a time (or times) in your life, when something keeps you up at night

for my wife and i, one of those times was when the twins showed up–the early months were truly nuts!!!

i remember, in the haze of those early days, my head hitting the pillow then bouncing back up–instantly…this would happen regularly because one of the twins was crying, hungry, or needed consolation…since we kept them on the same feeding schedule, we would be up a lot of nights on that front (my wife would breast-feed one and i would bottle-feed the other at the same time)…one morning, the sleepless nights became all too evident when my wife asked me, do you remember what you did last night?! (the one question that can strike fear in the heart of any husband)…i replied, uh, no, i don’t…she gave me a small smile and said, yeah,  i woke up to the sound of you shouting and rustling around in bed…she paused for dramatic effect…and said, i looked over to see you commando-crawling through the bed-sheets shouting, ‘i’ve got to get out of here, i’ve got to get out of here!’ (we still laugh about that night)…

…often times, i would be sitting up all night with one of the babies…then, glance at the clock and realize–hey, i’ve got to get ready for work…so, i would set the baby down, get cleaned up, go in and teach a full day…then, come home and do it all over again…and again…and again…i remember going into the bathroom one day at work…and, as i was washing my hands, i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror–it was ugly, i looked like hell (i was sportin’ what could be best described as the post-apocalyptic, world war z zombie look)–jeepers!  unfortunately, i wasn’t the only one who realized the ‘state of things’ in our world…because as i was walking down the hall to the copy room, my colleague stopped me and asked, are you alright?! (his face showed genuine concern–with a sprinkling of the early stages of panic:)…i mumbled some indiscernible response and continued on…in a way that would make the undead proud…

i didn’t really know what tired was until that point in my life…

so, if you’re there, at that point in your life…in the midst of a storm…where something is keeping you up at night…i wish for you peace, rest, and a good night’s sleep…i wish for you a silent night…

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