parent fail – good friday

i think enough time has passed…

i think enough time has passed to tell you this story…without it being a complete and total sacrilege…

so, there we were…

getting ready to go to church on good friday…

and we find ourselves in a conversation with our kids, our four year-olds…about Jesus dying…actually about Jesus being killed…

my wife: so, today you’re going to hear about how Jesus died.

me: actually, that Jesus was killed.

our son: Jesus died? Jesus was killed?

me: yes.

our son: who killed him?

me: some people who were not very nice.

our son: were they bad guys? were they bad ninjas?

and that was the end of the conversation…as my wife and i looked at each other knowingly–“well, that went well”…

[and chalked up parent fail #85]

season of wonder

when the kids and i got home a few days ago…

they started playing with the nativity set, like they always do at this time of year…

and like in years past, some “other friends” showed up…this year it was R2-D2 and a ninja…

immediately, the ninja started calling for help (the part of the ninja was being played by my son, jack)…

help! help! i’m trapped in the lasers!

Jesus’ mother and R2-D2 (both played by my daughter, grace) replied…

hold on! we’re coming!  we’re coming to save you! we’re the only ones that can!

i interjected…

wait, what about baby Jesus?!  can’t He help, too?!

grace replied…

no. they’re the only ones that can save him.  

🙂

merry christmas and may the force be with you!

what child is this?

one of the things that my wife and i absolutely love about our kids is “their little imaginations”…

we love to listen to them talk to each other and play and dream up stories and scenarios for their toys…for their stuffed animals, toy cars and trains, and action figures…whether jake the pirate, minnie mouse, thomas the train, hello kitty or mcqueen…it not only entertains them, but my wife and i as well…

sometimes, when they’re playing, we hear them using the same terms of endearment that we use regularly in our daily interactions with each other–like “babe” and “honey”…

they also do this with other household items and treasures that you might not always consider to be “toys”…like the nativity set we put up with all our other christmas decorations on the friday after thanksgiving…

soon after we had set up the nativity set, our children were playing with it and imagining different scripts…and we overheard them calling the different people in the nativity set…”babe” and “honey”…pretending and talking for joseph and mary…like this…

honey, will you get the baby Jesus?

[after a while, others were joining the celebration at the “mini-inn” in bethlehem…jake the pirate showed up, followed by mcqueen and my little pony…it was a regular party!]

times like these are sweet and warm the heart…other times, would be best described as ‘disturbing’…and leave us feeling like–

oh no, what did we do?! and we’re so going to hell for this!

like the recent time when we heard them combining the story of Jesus with the story of rapunzel 🙂

i could be wrong, but i’m guessing that there’s more of you out there who have heard the story of Jesus than the story of rapunzel…so, for those of you that aren’t familiar with the story of rapunzel…or haven’t read it since you were a kid…here’s a brief summary:

a husband and wife are about to have a baby, the wife gets hungry, the husband steals lettuce from a witch to feed his pregnant wife, the witch vows to take the baby when it’s born as a penalty for stealing the lettuce, the witch takes the baby when it’s born and hides her (rapunzel) in a tower, the witch visits rapunzel each day by climbing up rapunzel’s hair (she lowers ‘her hair’ when the witch calls, “rapunzel, rapunzel, let down your hair!”), a prince overhears the witch doing this, the prince calls to rapunzel and climbs up her hair, too, the prince and rapunzel fall in love, they plan to escape, the witch discovers their plans, the witch blinds the prince, the prince wanders the land aimlessly , the prince hears a ‘sweet singing’ one day, the singer is rapunzel (who has been let out of the tower), the prince and rapunzel embrace, rapunzel’s tears heal the prince, they marry and happily rule the kingdom…

[and, you’re thinking, why in God’s name did you read this story to your children?! good question…]

well, because we read our kids this story this is what we heard our daughter “pipe out” just a few days ago…

the baby Jesus is born…and honey, the witch comes and takes the baby Jesus away… 

[at this time, the part of the witch was being played by one of the three wise men (which my daughter was holding in her hand), who she moved to ‘swoop in’ and take baby Jesus away]

my wife and i were in the room when ‘this went down’…and we exchanged a panicked look and rushed to grace and said…

no, no, no…the witch is in a different story…the story of rapunzel…this is the story of Jesus, that’s what these figures show…

[while at the same time trying not to laugh]

after we talked to them, i sat down and thought...

mercy, me! 

thankfully, i believe that Jesus (and His story) is bigger and more powerful than the silliness of us parents and children…

and in time, when they’re older…they’ll realize what He means…for them and for the world…

merry christmas!

you’ll never walk alone

as difficult as it was to navigate the early days with twins (nearly) two years ago (see previous two posts)…what made it possible to survive…what lifted us up when we were down…what made the difference was…

the people who showed up in our lives…the physical presence of friends and family saved us…

as a man, to ask for help…to accept help–is not something i relish…”we men” (in general) are brought up to do it ourselves–if a job needs doing then we’ll take care of it on our own, for ourselves and for our families (images of john wayne blazing through town, tall in the saddle, fill my head)…because submitting to others or being that vulnerable–to need someone else’s help, to rely on someone else–would reveal a weakness in our very character as men…

but i had to do just that…i had to submit, i had to surrender at that moment (and thereafter on occasion), when they showed up for us…because, truth be told, we wouldn’t have survived the storm of ‘being new parents’ without reinforcements…

these visitations…by our friends and family–they were the living, breathing incarnations of love, care, courage, strength, and hope…

long ago, there was a singular, miraculous, and glorious incarnation…when, a little fellow was born…his name was Jesus…and he came to a world who needed him…to those who were alone, hungry, crazy, helpless, pained, excluded, poor, and more…in their weakness, in their vulnerability…

he showed up…embraced mankind…and spoke…

it’s o.k., i am here, i am with you, now and forever…