after rereading dark day again…it reminded me of all that was going on at the time.

it was a hard stage of life — without going into too much detail, there had been a series of hard things that happened back to back to back to back. and honestly, it felt like the universe had given me the ultimate beat down. it also felt like it wasn’t going to stop – like i was trapped, right in the middle of the shitty shit.

which led to overwhelming feelings of dread, despair, anxiety and fear.

feelings that were too hard for me to overcome on my own.

so i needed to reach out for help.

so i did.

and it helped.

nowadays, is a different time — different than when my parents were coming up and definitely different than when their parents were. some things are harder, but some things are easier. in their day, people buried or ignored the really hard things — there weren’t a lot of places to go to for help, and even if you wanted to, it was frowned upon (at the very least). so things didn’t get dealt with — and were passed onto the next generation. things that would pop up later (for the progeny) when life got hard.

i bring this up because, had i lived back then, i probably would’ve done what they did — but because of how things are today i had another option — and it really saved me.

the option was therapy.

the option was seeing a counselor.

the option was (and is) hard work.

the option is actually working (though i’m not to the past tense yet:)

and because i’m not to “the past tense yet” — i am still working at righting my ship.

[it’s important for you to know that i’m still working on things that went off the rails in march of this year — and to be honest, things that started before then.]

but, i’m getting better.

and that’s something to celebrate.

so, if you’ve been there (or you are there) — in a place where the world has punched you in the gut, in a place where the world has kicked you in the teeth — and you’re feeling that overwhelming dread and despair — reach out.

no matter if you’re 25 or 75 — or any age in-between — it’s not too late.

there is still hope.